Distractions or why my big, fat, black cat doesn’t realize just how close to death he is some days.

I have this big, fat, black cat who is perhaps the noisiest in the world. Sure, people who come to the house may think he’s cute and cuddly, but his constant meowing is highly annoying to me.

Today, I went into my closet to pray. I should stop there because that makes me sound pretty good. I go into my closet to pray. The fact is, I should probably go into my closet to pray more often because I’m also a person who likes to yell. I find myself yelling at my iPhone, gps, remote control, the floor (because I’m clumsy and find myself tripping occasionally), or at whatever else happens to annoy me at any given moment in time. I used to regularly yell at my computer but then I got a Mac so now I don’t do that as much anymore. I also yell at my cat quite a bit because he is so mouthy. His name is Scoots and most people who know him think he’s really cute and sweet. They just haven’t been around him long enough. He almost seems to make it his mission to be as bothersome as possible. He starts meowing first thing in the morning when he wants to be fed and then he keeps it up all day long. Usually when I go into my closet to pray I make sure to put Scoots out of my bedroom and sometimes even put him out on the back porch because whenever anyone is praying in the house he REALLY starts to meow. That is the absolute truth. You can ask anyone who has ever prayed in my house. Anyway, today I forgot to put him out of my room when I started to pray which was a pretty big oversight on my part. I get into the closet, start to pray, and Mr. Big Mouth Most Annoying Cat in The World comes up to the closet, sticks his head right up to the crack under the door, and starts meowing. Now I wish I was a good enough person to tell you that I continued with my prayer, but no. I yelled. Then I put the cat out on the porch. Then I continued praying. It goes without saying that I’m not perfect and perhaps need to pray a little more. Maybe all of you should join in praying for me as well.

This blog isn’t meant to address my yelling problem. I could probably write a book on that. What is the cause of my yelling problem? Perhaps anger issues or maybe some other negative reason? Of course not. I like to think of it as my “feisty” or “high spirited” personality shining through. But me yelling at that cat during prayer time was the perfect illustration of a distraction.

I have been in a bit of a funk over the past few weeks. If you were to examine my life now, things look to be in nice shape. We are all healthy, my husband has a good job, and things are going well in the activities I’m involved with. So as I was thinking through this mood that I’ve been in, the reason all came down to distractions. I’ve determined that my focus is off.

We can be distracted by so many things. Things like anxiety, trying to please others, wanting to be right, competitiveness, insecurity, health issues, money issues and the list goes on. Me, I also get distracted by almost any shiny object I see, so we can add that to the list. As a Christian, though, our focus is to be on Christ. Lately, my focus has been veering off Christ and moving towards other things. Things like a big, annoying, fat cat who won’t be quiet. These are the times I find myself in a funk. As aggravated as I was with myself for yelling at my cat in the middle of a prayer, I was also thankful for the obvious example of how our eyes can be taken off Christ. Yes, Scoots can get under my skin at times, but I’ll have to admit that he is pretty cute and helped me learn a mighty big lesson. Maybe Mr. Loud Mouth will get a can of tuna out of this whole deal.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:1-2 ESV)

Be Thou My Vision

I sing on the worship team at church. I’ve also taken up playing the tambourine. The tambourine thing is an irrelevant point, but I thought I’d mention it because I’m having a fine time playing that tambourine. We rehearse before our service on Sunday mornings. There are a few people who come in while we are rehearsing to set up before the service begins. One of the families who come in on a regular basis has two young daughters. Those two girls have the lovely habit of dancing and twirling to the music as we are playing our songs. I always think it’s sweet to see those two girls dance around because I have two girls of my own who are grown now, and for those of you who are mothers who have grown daughters, you know how that type of thing can make you feel pretty sentimental. But this Sunday seeing those girls dance hit me hard.

My friend and her husband have five children. Three of these children are adopted. Two of the adopted children are these precious little girls. One is from China and the other is from Africa. I can remember the day my friend told me the story about how her youngest daughter made the long journey from China to America. I didn’t know my friend very well at the time, but I cried when I heard the story. I cried because I was sad for what she had been through, but I also cried for joy because of what she had been rescued from. I guess that’s what you might call bittersweet tears. I also know the story of the older daughter, and it’s bittersweet as well. When I saw the girls joyfully dancing to songs of praise this past Sunday, I became overwhelmed by their stories and how these girls who were orphans had been given a family. I thought about how Christ rescues us from darkness and how through him we become the children of God. This past Sunday we sang “Be Thou My Vision”, and it was one of the songs the girls were dancing to as we rehearsed. These words from this song have even more meaning to me now as I think about these little girls.

Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;

I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;

Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;

Thou in me dwelling and I with Thee one.

 

 

A melted blizzard will ruin a late library book big time.

I got a gym membership for Christmas. Today was my second day going and it was great. We’ve lived in Georgia for around 5 or 6 years now, and my workouts have consisted of walking and hiking outside, so I’m pretty happy to incorporate the gym facilities into my workout routine. As I was looking around at all of the people in the class that I took, I got a little judgmental and started wondering how many people would stop going to the gym as time went on. I know a lot of people make resolutions to work out and lose weight at the beginning of the year and then sort of lose steam as time goes on. I, however, have a track record of being faithful to a workout program. Even when I worked full-time, had two small children at home, and a husband who traveled frequently, I still fit in an exercise routine. Working out is not a hard thing for me. It’s a fun thing. It’s good it’s a fun thing because eating well is not a fun thing for me. I consider candy, cookies and cake to be a major food group and potatoes are my favorite vegetable, so exercise allows me to indulge every now and again.  But really, I have no place to judge folks who have a difficult time sticking to an exercise program because working out is a pretty easy thing for me to do.

But it did make me think about doing hard things. When Tim and I were in college, before we were married, he asked me to return a library book. Please note, never ask me to return a library book. Anyway, I put the book in the back floor of my car and forgot about it. After several weeks, or maybe even several months, I forget now, he asked me if I returned the book. If I would have just sucked it up and faced the situation head on then, it may have been a little uncomfortable, but it would have been taken care of. Instead I used my amazing ability to skirt the issue and somehow managed to leave the book in the back floor of my car for several more weeks. Back then DQ blizzards were all the rage and Tim and I went to get one on a nice afternoon. When I was finished with mine, I threw it in the back floor of my car. Of course, I didn’t finish my entire blizzard because those things are so darned BIG!! Did I mention that another hard thing for me to do is keep a clean car? Well, several more weeks went by and Tim got in the back seat of my car for some reason. I discovered that day that a melted blizzard ruins a late library book beyond repair. It makes a huge mess.

Most of us don’t like to do hard things. But the longer we let them go on, or the more we are willing to use our amazing abilities to skirt the issue, the bigger our messes become. We still talk about that book sometimes. It’s become one of those stories that we like to tell and laugh about. But when I think about it I can’t even remember how much money we had to pay for that library book. I’m sure it was more money than we had at the time. And the sad thing is I was the one who made the mess, but Tim ended up paying for it, too.

Reflecting on this reminds me of when Christ was talking to the rich young ruler. Jesus asked the young man to do the hard thing of giving up his worldly possessions and following him. Sadly, the young man found this just too hard to do.  His earthly riches proved to be more important to him than following Christ. Whether it’s confessing to trashing your boyfriend’s book with a blizzard or sticking to a commitment to exercise, we all find some things difficult to do. Most importantly, we all need to consider what hard thing Christ is asking us to do and if we are willing to do it.

And he said, “All these I have kept from my youth.” When Jesus heard this, he said to him, “One thing you still lack. Sell all that you have and distribute to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” But when he heard these things, he became very sad, for he was extremely rich.  (Luke 18:21-23 ESV)

I’m getting a new wedding band

I’m getting a new wedding band. I have a particular style in mind. I don’t want anything that costs too much and am looking for something pretty simple. I don’t really like or wear expensive jewelry. My current wedding band only cost $19 and I don’t even wear an engagement ring along with it. Most of my favorite pieces of jewelry were made by a friend of mine, pieces that I picked up in Africa for cheap, special items that were given to me by friends or family, or other things that I just found on sale here and there. The only reason that I’m getting a new band is that I would like a new style. I will keep and cherish the old band. I’ve had it for a long time now.

Tim and I have been married for 26 years. We are thinking about having one of those marriage renewal ceremonies, and it’s probably not a bad idea now that I’m getting a new wedding band. It would be nice to have a small ceremony in the presence of our daughters, family, and a few close friends. We planned on doing this a few years back. We were going to go to Vegas for the ceremony. We wanted to go to there because one night before our wedding we were dangerously close to flying out to Vegas with a friend to get married (sorry mom, I don’t think you knew this). That didn’t happen, but we thought because of this earlier event, Vegas would be the perfect place to renew our vows. Also, a shiny, sparkly, over the top dress would work well there, too, so I thought it was a great idea at the time. Unfortunately, some unexpected events happened and we were unable to fly anywhere for a while, so the renewal ceremony was put on hold. That was about 15 years ago. Hopefully, we will be able to make this one happen.

God has blessed us with a good marriage. People say that marriage is a lot of work, and I suppose that’s true, even though it hasn’t always seemed like a lot of work to me. But I have stepped back and looked at our marriage to see what has made it work, and I think I see two things that stand out the most. First, while the two of us have always had other friends, our first priority has been our marriage. When free time is hard to come by rather than spend it with others, we spend it together. Our relationship has always been our top priority. Second, we have always worked as a team. We serve together in church and the community, we have been on the same page when it comes to our children (no ask mom if dad says no), and we each work for the best interest of the other.

All that said, our marriage isn’t perfect. Tim annoys me sometimes. More often than not, I annoy him. I annoy myself sometimes because I’m a pretty annoying person when it comes down to it. I’m sure if you were around us long enough, you would find plenty of things wrong with both of us. But I sure am happy that I’ve been wearing this $19 wedding band for the past 26 years. I can’t wait to wear my new one for many more.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

(Genesis 2:24 ESV)

Glory Days or Why We Don’t Decorate Our Tree

We don’t have a big elaborate Christmas in the Sherwood household. We put up a tree, but I’ve gotten out of the habit of putting decorations on it. I think that started about 4 years or so ago, and now it’s become a sort of strange tradition of ours. We don’t put up a lot of other decorations either. We’ve downsized gift giving, I don’t do much, if any, Christmas baking and we don’t mail out Christmas cards. Some people may be reading this and think that there is something wrong with our family. Some of you may know us and realize there is something wrong with our family, but that’s another story. Some of you may be wondering if we’re even American! But I think over the years we slowly started to feel that Christmas was becoming too hectic and it was taking the joy out of the season. It was causing us to forget what we were really celebrating.

So this has been a pretty laid back Christmas season so far, and it’s been nice. I’ve enjoyed having my girls home from college even though the amount of garbage that we have produced has more than doubled since they have come home and boy you wouldn’t believe how many Capri Suns two skinny young women can drink in two days time.

But the point of all of this isn’t Capri Suns or garbage output. I’ve been thinking a lot about gifts lately. My girls both got the same wonderful gift from their Grandma for Christmas. She got them both old-fashioned record players. Once they opened them, they headed straight for my old LPs and started playing them. If memory serves me right, the first song they played was Bruce Springsteen’s “Glory Days”. I got the biggest kick out of hearing them sing along and watching them dance around the room to my old record. That gift made them happy, it made me happy, and gosh, it made us all happy!

While working out in our community  I’ve had the opportunity to see some folks be very generous with their gifts. Gifts of service, charity, kindness and time. It’s made me wonder why some people take joy in being so generous. It’s certainly not always an easy thing to do. But of course it’s because these people truly realize the gift that has been given to them in Christ. They have been transformed by this and are giving out of their joy. The gift they received gave them true joy and it shows through a generous spirit in their day-to-day lives.

……… the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.

(Romans 12:8 ESV)

Drinking Glasses

There was a young lady who came to live with us a little while back. She stayed with us for about a year and then she got married and went on her way. The wedding was in our basement, which was pretty cool and something that I will always remember. Our family was blessed by being a part of this.  She and her husband are now in our small group at church, and we had our Christmas party the other night. As part of the Christmas party we have a white elephant gift exchange – you know, one of those things where everyone brings a silly gift, each person chooses a gift according to a drawn number, and then people can steal gifts according to the next highest number. For my gift I brought these “drinking glasses” that have been around my house for ages because I bought them for my niece and kept forgetting to give them to her. Drinking glasses are these glasses that you wear and use as a drinking straw. They are the PERFECT white elephant gift if you ask me. Well, I get to the party with my perfect white elephant gift and the girl who used to live with us comes up and whispers to me what her perfect white elephant gift is – drinking glasses! We both brought the same perfect white elephant gift! What are the chances of that?!

Why did we both bring drinking glasses to the party? I don’t know, except for the obvious fact that the two of us have exceptional taste, and the “great minds think alike” thing. But us bringing the same item to the party made me think about how this young lady has become part of our family. We have come to know her well. She has become a part of our lives and we have become a part of hers.

Tim and I have lived away from most of our extended family for the majority our married life. But we have learned, and pray that our children have learned as well, that family extends beyond our household. I’m thankful for all the opportunities that we’ve had to build our family by becoming part of other’s lives, and allowing other’s to become a part of ours, even if that process can be a little trying at times. Through this, we have had the true privilege of growing our family.

And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.
(Acts 2:46-47 ESV)

My husband has a broken heart

Thinking back, I guess my husband has had a broken heart ever since I’ve known him. Maybe I used to think of it as a big heart but really, it’s a broken heart. Back when we first met there was this woman with some little kids at a gas station who had a broken down car. She needed money to get the car fixed, but she said she was broke. Tim gave her what little money he had to help her fix that car. At the time we were poor college students and didn’t have much money of our own to spare. He just saw a person who needed help, so he helped her.

When he was 40 years old, in August of 2004, we found out that he had heart disease. He seemed to be healthy one moment, and then the next he’s in the hospital getting a stent put in his heart. I remember waiting to get results from a nuclear stress test the day we went to the emergency room. The room we were in was filled with a bunch of men at least 20 years older than Tim who looked to be in very poor health. The results indicated that Tim needed some work done on his heart immediately, and I started crying when I had to sign a form stating the risks of open heart surgery, just in case he needed to have that done. This one very kind, but very sickly looking, older gentleman took my hand and told me everything would be alright. I still wonder how that man is doing.

There’s a reason I’ve started thinking so much about Tim’s heart lately. I am writing this on the day before Thanksgiving 2011. We got test results back yesterday that indicate that Tim possibly has another blockage in his heart. Being the holiday weekend, we have to wait until Monday to talk to the cardiologist to see what the next step is. If there is a blockage, I’m thankful that it was caught early so it can be taken care of. I still, however, don’t like to hear this news.

I am not happy about the broken heart that my husband has due to heart disease. If I had things my way, I would make that disease go away today. But I am happy to see Tim’s example of another kind of a broken heart. He hasn’t changed at all since we first met. He still steps in to help those in need, even if that help ends up costing him something in the end. And that cost isn’t always finanicial, but is often offered as time taken out of a full schedule, lending a helping hand when he’s tired himself, giving a kind word when I know he’s had a bad day, opening up our home when the fact is he’s a pretty private person by nature, or doing just whatever needs to be done. He does this because he has a heart that is broken for those who are in need or are hurting. I’m grateful to be married to a man like this.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

(Psalm 147:3 ESV)